Sunday, June 12, 2011

Being a Winner

I've never won a contest before.

I did end up with a picture in a gothic pin up calendar, but that wasn't a contest with prizes. Usually, I thumb through the winners, admire their work, sometimes follow them on flickr, and nurse my bruised heart in secret.

Not this time, yo!

Flamingo

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Fairy Ear
Skin: Curio, Petal April - Rainbow 1
Eyeliner: cheLLe, Cleo Called teal
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle
Hair: Truth, Miku - macaroon
Dress: Blue Blood, Oceanic Sonata
Necklace 1: Silent Sparrow, Chapiteau Locket - seanorse
Necklace 2: Earthstones, Tree of Live Necklace - Summer
Pose: Glitterati, 087

Location: Eagles Island (Adult)
Light Settings: [TOR] SCIFI - Fog mystic 1
Water Settings: [TOR] Meridian verde


Ocean Sonata had been in my "to be photographed" folder for a while. I have a huge amount of my inventory taken up by Blue Blood, and for a while I was buying... pretty much all of her fatpacks. Ocean Sonata was a special purchase, and comes with the gloves. Especially in comparison to the other two winners, I selected a very bright, cheerful layout for my picture - not at all gothic. It took forever to photograph because the flamingos in the pictures were actually mobile - so there was a long time spend waiting for them to get into an attractive relationship with my poor, arm-stretched avatar.

I paired it with double necklaces from Earthstones and Silent Sparrow, continuing my doubling up on jewelry trend from denim week. I also added the cheLLe eye liner - something which is quickly becoming an addictive habit; it adds a wonderful hint of color, subtle but strong, and sets off the Curio skin - one of my rainbow favorites - gorgeously. The hair is Truth's Miko, a cute, Japanese-styled hair with a tintable bow that almost instantly became teal for this picture. The pose is Glitterati, which is quickly becoming my go-to pose shop. I love all the different moods, though some of that might be an effect of owning... well rather a lot of her model poses. In fact, almost all of them but some of the mid-twenties.

Open Boxes

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Fairy Ear
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle
Hair: Tukinowaguma, Adelita - Gold w/black roses
Dress: Blue Blood, Tahiti - Pink
Shoes: G Field, Rose Bootie "Diva" - pink
Pose: Glitterati, 140

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: [TOR] Awesome Atmo 4


The prize for first place was 3k in Blue Blood clothing, and honestly it didn't take me long to decide. I've been focusing my money on Meeroos recently, and the odd horse, and fallen back on my purchases. Bad Deo! It doesn't help I'm sadly in arrears with opening my boxes, though I've managed to sort through my "new" folder. It didn't take me long to pick out a truly blessed selection of dresses, and it took me only slightly longer to go, "I should make a blog post!"

The first photoshoot illustrated for me, though, why I'm not purely a fashion blogger. I love fashion, and I love photography, but the Tahiti Pink dress above (also from Blue Blood) has been remade into an entirely different, magenta-red color by the lighting I chose, and I'm far to amused by my having green skin despite wearing a Cream Sparkle skin from De La Soul. This is a bad advertisement in some ways, as you need this rather odd windlight setting to get the color and effect, but I love how it looks despite it being... ominous.


Pillar of the Community

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Fairy Ear
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle
Hair: Magika, Mini - Golden Blond
Dress: Blue Blood, Karina - purple
Shoes: Eclectica, Garden Party Shoes - lilac
Pose: Glitterati, 012

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: [TOR] Eno Would be Proud


I don't particularly enjoy picking apart clothing and offering critiques. Now and then I will - and so far I've gotten positive responses even from those being critiqued - but when I wax long-spoken I'd rather it be on some obscure point of philosophy rather than whether I can see a seam, or if something lines up. That being said, I sometimes thing the combination of philosophical ramblings and pretty pictures of a faerie in different clothes is a somewhat... shall we say messed up premise? There seems to be this tension between being pretty, and being academic; or perhaps it's just that those who like one don't as much like the other? I'm not as much sure.

It is also odd for me to shift between credits for pictures, and commentary on them - and whatever greater point I have. I'm never sure if the transitions are smooth, or whether I should put all the credits up near the top so the people just interested in the clothing can move on without being bothered by endless rambling on things which matter only to a subset of the internet. This is made harder in posts like this, where the pictures are of a wider variety than normal - how do you balance the two, appearance and depth of thought; credits and self-indulgent verbiage?

Diode

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Fairy Ear
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle
Hair: Anathema, Loose Ponytail (not available yet)
Dress: Blue Blood, Karina - Whitegoth Green
Boots: katat0nik, Ice/Berry Sweetheart Boot - light green
Pose: Glitterati, 194

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: Places: Astryls Wild


As a side note, Blue Blood has joined the wide number of creators with auto-unpacking boxes for their clothing which are also decorative. I took a picture wearing what some of the dresses came in, mostly because it struck me so strongly as an amazing sort of thing. The temptation to begin hanging on to packaging for the purpose of wearing it as a form of clothing is immense - and that adds an additional delight to clothing. There is an underlying theme of multiple layers - of things which are multiple things at once - which is intrinsic to human beings and uniquely possible in Second Life.

Like my bottle opener which is a fish, and like trying to be a fashionaerie who lapses regularly into existential philosophy and social psychology, I like things which operate on multiple layers; I like things which offer a variety of things, a variety of ways to be depending on taste, desire, and circumstances rather than One True Thing to rule them all.

Ironically, this could be viewed as a One True Thing of multiplicity.

Floating Roses

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle
Hat (with hair): Eclectica, Knitted Cloche Hat
Jewelry: Eclectica, Manhattan - Quartz
Dress: Blue Blood, Tahiti - Black & White
Boots: Dilly Dolls, Shrew Boots Dark
Pose: Glitterati, 061

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: Places: Astryls Wild


I've been dwelling recently on how we can value differences while honoring our own truth. It seems like a basic problem which expands to multiple areas of life, from my forays into social justice to blogging about fashion. So often the praising of one thing implies a critique of others; there seems to be an underlying urge for focusing on the few, an inner core of sorts, even within diverse populations like second life. And so you have the somewhat artificial "battles" between Second Life and Facebook, which seem less to be intrinsic to one belonging to one, the other, or (in my case) both and more manufactured to give a sense of controversy and in-group belonging.

Likewise, I find the implication that breedable pets make Second Life somehow less creative to be less a central conflict, and more a shibboleth of a certain, self-referential identification. Meeroos don't make it impossible for artists to do art; they simply offer something else for people to do and focus on. More options, not fewer. Having never been involved in breeding before, I've been enjoying trying different things with my meeroos and seeing what happens - never before has a hobby I had involved a spreadsheet! It's also not led me to neglect my actual, offline pet, any more than the breedable plants I'm making involved neglecting my offline plants - though in the latter case I can keep needed information on a notecard instead of breaking out the office software.

Arch

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle
Hair: Lamb, Wild Nothing - Honeycomb
Outfit: Blue Blood, Karina - Red
Boots: Favole, Devil's Advocate
Pose: Glitterati, 004

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: [TOR] HORROR - Namob Isle


I find myself increasingly frustrated by the demand that we be only one thing, focus on only one thing, belong to only one group, have only one focus. Granted, it is sometimes difficult and frustrating to belong to several seemingly mutually exclusive groups. I currently have three circles of friends on Second Life that I have to keep separate, for the enjoyment and peace of mind of members of each group. I also have a group and place I cannot be a part of, for my own enjoyment and peace of mine.

I remember, the first pain that I suffered through Second Life triggered an unusual reaction in a dear friend of mine - she asked me to please not leave the grid. It honestly hadn't occurred to me, nor did it seem something I was likely to do, simply because of a deeply bruised heart. In reflection, though, and after reading some of the louder and quieter 'leaving Second Life' posts on various blogs, I understand more clearly where her worry came from. One possible effect of having a singular focus in Second Life is that when pain occurs along that line, the desire to remain engaged can quickly wither and die.

On My Knees

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Favole, Peace
Hair: Tukinowaguma, Ariana Gold w/white roses
Outfit: Blue Blood, Karina - Lilac
Pasties: Beautiful, Dirty, Rich, Heat Pasties - White
Belly Ring: Caithlin Carter Designs, Pure Butterfly
Boots: G Field, Flower Pumps "Eve" - white
Pose: Glitterati, 122

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: [TOR] HORROR - Namob Isle


Likewise, having only one or two things one does in any given medium means the interest is both volatile and fragile. One of the major advantages I've found to blogging is that it begins to form even more connections for me through the appreciation of the creations of others, and their approval of how I present them. One of the disadvantage is the delicate, unspoken threads of demands - the feeling within myself that I owe responses, owe posts, that I should review this or that. There is a quiet guilt for not covering more of my friends more regularly, a pleasure when I can fulfill a request, worries when I can't or don't want to review something, a vague wonder if I will be found wanting for letting something linger in my inventory until I remember it or inspiration strikes.

I want to emphasize these are internal pressures, not based on the actions or reactions of anyone toward me.

Princess in the Tower

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Favole, Peace
Hair: Exile, Sadie - Blond frost
Outfit: Blue Blood, Karina - Teal and Whitegoth Green Mixed
Boots: G Field, Flower Pumps "Eve" - White
Pose: Glitterati, 111

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: [TOR] FOGGY - Mint Teahouse


I began the blog as a place to share my photography and a few of my thoughts, and it gradually formed toward a fashion blog as I responded to the responses of store owners and friends. One thing I've learned through time-crunching events like the Fashion Faire, though, is that my strength is not in up to date responses to things as they happen, but rather reflections back and responses to the zeitgeist of the blogs I read and how they intersect with thoughts and experiences in non-SL online places and offline. For my blog to be a joy, and not a chore, I must respond to internal triggers, to stretch my net out widely and catch up any number of fishes, spreading them out for those who are interested.

Sometimes I think I spread too widely, pulling together too many things into a whole that is not cohesive. Balancing many things is a challenge - keeping plates spinning, then setting them down one by one without cracking any of them.

Melt

Credits:
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Cream Sparkle
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: ReToX, Bone Wings - Black Metal
Hair: Gauze, Obscura - Gold
Outfit: Blue Blood, Karina - Black
Piercing: Rol Glam-arous, Corset Piercing - Black
Boots: G Field, Bow Strap Shoes "Kate" - black
Pose: Glitterati, 121

Location: Omega Point
Light Settings: [TOR] EUPHORIA low saturation dull deposit


And then I remember I'm not a clown, and this isn't a performance - it's more organic than that. This is the multiple threads of my life, online and off, all interacting and effecting each other in different ways, making up the tapestry of my life. It's a tapestry where I want - where I prefer - variety. It is also a tapestry where I dismiss some threads without a thought, or with minimal thought; it's hard for me to remember that I don't have to accept all opinions of those around me, or spend time weighing them for veracity. I can simply focus on the things I want to, however multiple those may be.

( More pictures here. )

No comments:

Post a Comment